Saturday, August 30, 2014

Fifty and Counting!

So, it's finally here...the day that I have been preparing for since 2008. I am 50 years old! A lot has changed since my first post here. Although, I haven't accomplished everything on my things to do before turning 50; however, I accomplished other things not on my list.

Perhaps procrastination may have played its role too, but only because I had other more important things to take care of. My bucket list took a back seat. I now realize that if I always base my success on the list, then I am limiting myself only to what's on the list. So, I try to focus my energy to what is right in front of me and still work my way through the list...in baby steps. Little by little-- slowly, but surely!.

It's not that I am no longer driven to complete my list, it's just that I've changed. Yes, I have! I was wrong to put a deadline in fulfilling my list. What's the rush? I had this notion that if I accomplish everything on my list before or by the time I turn 50 then I would look back with pride and say, wow I accomplished what I set out to do! However, life happens and other things became more a priority than my bucket list.

When people say "life begins at 40", it really does. It's when you really think things through and, before you know it, 50 hits! I may be getting older, but I am getting wiser too. Yes, the proverbial anecdote-- as you age comes more wisdom. So, my wisdom is dictating to me that, no matter what happens, bucket list or no bucket list, to live my life to its fullest. That, I have the rest of my life to do the best I can and not just count my accomplishments just so I could brag that I've done them all! For, even if I had completed the list before 50, I would never be truly happy if I did them only just for the sake of crossing them off my list.

So, now what? What's next? Do I destroy or completely ignore my bucket list? I'd say leave it for now and let life takes its course. I also learned to be spontaneous and to accept things I cannot change. I go with the direction of the wind, wherever it will take me. Taking a leap past half a century of my life and looking back at what I had accomplished, I feel so blessed and grateful, first and foremost to God and second to the people who have been there for me through the years. I've done so many things and have a lot more to do.

Life is great! I am thankful even for the not-so-great things that happened in the past century. I'm also thankful to find new friends along the way and have meaningful relationships with. I am grateful, even with so many hardships in life, that I am still here and able to praise God and bring joy to others while I live my life to the fullest. Even if I could take back the hands of time to change anything in my life, I wouldn't. I have no regrets. Without the trials and obstacles, I would not be as strong!


As I reflect on the past and prepare for retirement and my twilight years, I am so content to know that I have done a lot of things, some greater than others, some may be menial, but they all helped me become who I am today. Although, I want to say I did it all when I cross the finish line, I'd rather say I did my best and lived my life with passion and zeal. That I have done well not only for myself, but for those that I love-- the ones I hold near and dear to my heart. Finally, I hope, somehow, I leave a mark in their hearts and inspire them to love life and enjoy living it as much as I!